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"Public School Teacher: America's Most Thankless Job"

by:  Keith Balmer

During the State of the Union Address, President Obama encouraged people to become teachers:
“To every young person listening tonight who’s contemplating their career choice: If you want to make a difference in the life of our nation; if you want to make a difference in the life of a child — become a teacher. Your country needs you.”
I'm sure that line sounded good to a lot of people. And the media gave him props for it the next day. But when he said it, I didn't become inspired. I became sad. A somber feeling washed over me like a summer rain.
After Obama's line about teachers, I said this out loud to no one in particular:
"Why would ANYONE want to be a teacher?"
To all you parents who have children who want to be teachers when they grow up, you do a disservice to them if you aren't honest about how tragic this profession is. I know of people I went to college with, people who studied to be teachers. People who were talented and passionate. People who could not wait to make a difference in the lives of our children.
But once they became teachers, their dreams eventually turned into nightmares. And after a couple of years, they said, "I QUIT!"
It is a fact that half of all new teachers either quit or are fired within their first five years. And this is a bad thing because if our teachers are leaving, who are our teenagers supposed to have sex with?
Sorry teachers. Couldn't resist.
The point I'm trying to make is that this profession has a way of breaking your spirit. And to make my case, I came up with a list of reasons why public school teachers have the most demoralizing, most thankless job in America.
Overcrowded Classrooms
I remember when I was in school. There was never more than 25 students in any of my classes. But that was sooooo 1980s! Today, teachers routinely have to deal with classroom sizes of 30 or more students. It's hard enough to teach 25 kids, but 35?
Last week in Detroit, state education officials decided that in order to balance the books, they would need to close half the city's schools. And because of this decision, teachers in Detroit are now expected to teach in classrooms with up to 60 students!
If I was in Detroit I would put up signs all over the city that said: "IF YOU CAN READ THIS, YOU DID NOT ATTEND A DETROIT PUBLIC SCHOOL!"
You're not "teaching" 60 high school students. That's not "teaching", that's crowd control. When these teachers go shopping to buy supplies for class, I hope they don't forget their riot gear and their bullhorns.
Teacher on bullhorn: "EVERYBODY, PLEASE TURN OFF YOUR CELLPHONES! OPEN YOUR BOOKS TO CHAPTER SEVEN! AND PUT AWAY YOUR GUNS UNTIL THE END OF CLASS!"
But who cares right? These kids in Detroit are poor. Educating them would be nice, but it's a luxury we can't afford if the rich have to pay taxes to fund it!
Lousy Parents
Consider this scenario: A fourth-grade teacher tells 10-year old Ricky to have a seat and stop disrupting class. Lil Ricky responds by telling his teacher, "SHUT THE FUCK UP BITCH!"
Lil Ricky, who is a precocious little psychopath, is sent to the office. His mother is called. An hour later she shows up fresh from the beauty salon wearing skin tight pants, a ridiculous amount of jewelry, and fingernails so long they would make Freddy Krueger blush.
But instead of doing the adult thing, instead of doing the responsible thing, instead of taking out her anger at her son, she takes it out on the school. And she is really, really, really pissed at the teacher.
"HOW DARE SHE TELL MY KID WHAT TO DO? WHO THE FUCK SHE THINK SHE IS?"
And because the principal is intimidated by loud, demonstrative parents, and because the principal is a coward, Lil Ricky goes right back to class unscathed. And the teacher's authority gets undermined right in front of her other students.
Or how about the parents who play no role in their child's education whatsoever? The teacher will call this parent and express concern about her child's performance in class. But the parent could care less. The only thing the parent says to the teacher is "JUST DO YOUR DAMN JOB!"
Or how about the parents who never show up for PTA meetings? Or the parents who try to tell the teacher how to do their job? Or the parents who blame the teacher because their lazy kid is failing? Or the parents who allow their children to boss them around?
We have a nation full of lousy parents. And if you don't think so, then you've obviously never seen the reality show "Toddlers & Tiaras."
So many parents are terrible. And this is why our nation has so many . . .
Rude and Disrespectful Children 
NEWS FLASH: The children of 2011 are whiny, obnoxious, disrespectful, arrogant, lazy, and spoiled little brats. The only "book" they have any interest in reading is Facebook. They talk back, they sleep in class, they spend all class texting, the boys dress nutty, the girls dress slutty, and so many of them are only there to pass the time.
I bet you didn't know that everyday in America, a teacher is assaulted by a student. I bet you didn't know that some classrooms are so loud that teachers actually use wireless mics when they speak.
Natalie Monroe, a high school teacher in Pennsylvania, was suspended in February for comments she made on her blog. She said her students were "out of control, disengaged whiners, and frightfully dim."
In her blog, she never mentioned the school she worked at, she never mentioned any student by name, and she only used her first name and her picture. But somebody found out, and that's why she was suspended.
I read a few comments and was surprised that people were saying how "teachers shouldn't have these feelings."
This is the worst generation of children we've ever produced. And if you don't believe me, then you've never sat through an entire episode of "My Super Sweet 16" or "16 and Pregnant." And if you're upset that Natalie Monroe said publicly, what thousands of teachers are saying privately, you need to wake up and smell the coffee.
Or maybe you should spend a year substitute teaching. That'll change your mind real quick.
Standardized Tests
On Season 4 of The Wire (the greatest TV drama of all-time), a new middle school teacher named Prez struggled to connect with his bored, disinterested students. So he came up with an idea. Since his kids came from the streets, he decided to teach them math by allowing them to play the dice games they played on the corner. It was brilliant. He taught them math on their level and they responded beautifully.
But then his principal said that he would have to do away with his adventurous curriculum. Why? Because the school was under pressure to pass the standardized testing from George W. Bush's No Child Left Behind Act. Prez was now required to "teach the test." He was no longer teaching them math. He was teaching them how to pass a test. And his engaged students went right back to being bored and disinterested.
No Child Left Behind started this whole test-taking craze. And what has President Obama done? He and his Secretary of Education (Arne Duncan) have come up with their own high-stakes testing format, "Race To The Top."
But here's the ugly truth about Race To The Top: It sucks! It wants to fix schools by closing them (Huh???). It believes merit pay is the answer (it's not). And it believes charter schools should be expanded (80 percent of charter schools are no better than public schools).
Race To The Top has turned our kid's education into a competitive reality TV show (The Amazing Race!). Like some bizarre sporting event, states have to compete with each other for federal money.
What is this? The March Madness of Public Education? Do they have brackets in USA Today? Are there office pools? Do states find out their test scores on SportsCenter?
Public schools have been educating our children for decades. But the industry has been hijacked by testing companies and politicians.  For all of you who are in favor of standardized testing, it would be wise to remember that a test is like a picture. It's a snapshot in time. It won't tell you what happens every day in a school. The private sector is getting rich off of testing materials and "teaching to the test" has imploded the wonderful curriculum that used to be taught every day.
And if you don't believe me, ask Prez!
The Attacks On Teacher's Unions & The Demonization Of Teachers
I recently watched "Waiting For Superman," the acclaimed documentary from Guggenheim Davis. And guess what? I HATED IT!
In the film, Davis compares our kids to the kids in Finland. The public school system in Finland is consistently ranked as the best in the world. But why would he compare us to Finland? Number one, the Finnish have less poverty than we do. Fewer than five percent of children in Finland live in poverty, as compared to 20 percent in the U.S. Number two, Finland seldom tests its students. And number three, the teachers in Finland are all unionized!
But he doesn't mention that. Instead, he wants us to believe that the villains are the unions. They are the Death Star and Randi Weingarten (President of the American Federation of Teachers) is Darth Vader.
He even played ominous music when Weingarten first appeared in the film. I'm surprised he didn't roll her out strapped to a gurney wearing a Hannibal Lecter mask:
"A superintendent tried to fire one of my teachers. I ate her liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti."
In the film, Davis also mentions India. But why would he compare us to India? Public school in India is optional. American kids are required by law to attend school until they're 16. But in India there are over 400 million people who are illiterate. There are more people in India who can't read, than there are people in the United States. If school was optional here in America don't you think our test scores would be higher too?
At one point Davis said that "teachers are the single most important factor in determining student achievement."
Sorry Guggenheim, but I'm calling the "Bullshit Police" so they can arrest you and haul your ass off to jail!
Teachers are the most important factor while the kids are in school. But what about the other 16 hours of the day? What about the students who are homeless, in foster care, have absentee parents, or suffer from poor nutrition? I don't care how talented a teacher is, if little Christina comes to class hungry everyday because there is no food in her refrigerator, she is going to struggle!
Davis also believes the answer to our kid's education lies in charter schools. But in the words of that great American philosopher Flavor Flav, "Don't Believe The Hype!"
Only 17 percent of charter schools are excellent. 46 percent are no different than any public school. And 37 percent are worse.
But I'll tell you why he believes in charter schools. Because those teachers don't belong to unions. And he subscribes to the free-market ethos that says, "Capitalism is awesome and everything must be privatized!" Did you know that the same hedge fund executives on Wall Street who crashed our economy are making millions of dollars a year from charter schools?
Guggenheim Davis doesn't mention this.
The film also shows how students are selected to attend charter schools. It's very unsettling. They are invited to attend a lottery. They are given a number and have to sit in an auditorium and hope that their number gets called. But most of them won't make it because the odds are daunting. How would you like your daughter's chances if there were 500 applicants and only 40 available seats?
Because of the high-stakes testing of NCLB, charter schools compete with public schools to get higher test scores (and the federal money that comes with it). So charter schools have a financial incentive to avoid students who: (1.) don't speak a lick of English, (2.) are special needs, and (3.) come from broken homes.
Bill Gates is interviewed in the film. Gates doesn't come from a background in education. He comes from a background in making money. And if you listen to him talk, you'll hear a guy who is spectacularly uninformed. And yet, his ideas on "reform" are treated as gospel.
I respect and admire Bill Gates. But who in the hell made him superintendent of our nation's schools?
And finally, I hated how "Waiting For Superman" turned highly controversial, and former Washington D.C. School Chancellor Michelle Rhee into a heroic figure we should all root for.
Child please! Michelle Rhee is a hot mess!
If you listen to her, she'll tell you that the unions stopped her from reforming D.C. schools during her tumultuous three-year reign. However, the unions didn't prevent her from building an aggressive teacher evaluation system, didn't keep her from closing schools, didn't keep her from firing weak teachers, and didn't keep her from refusing to lay off teachers based on last hired, first fired.

                                                  Michelle Rhee wants to "Rhee-form" public schools.
Her abrasive, dictatorial style caused so many teachers, principals, and parents to recoil in horror. She was a polarizing figure and very likely one of the main reasons that Adrian Fenty, the D.C. mayor who hired her, was not elected to a second term.
She didn't accomplish jack during her reign of error. But she talked tough, she fired people, and she battled the unions. So OF COURSE the national media and the political class adores her. She has appeared on the cover of Time, Newsweek, appeared on Oprah, Meet The Press, and was featured in a 12-part miniseries on PBS' The Newshour.
Why is she so damn popular with politicians and the media? I'll allow Richard Kahlenberg of Slate to explain:
"Rhee's message about education reform is seductive because it's simple and optimistic. Childhood poverty and economic school segregation are just excuses for teacher failure. If we could just get unions to agree to stop protecting bad teachers and allow great teachers to be paid more, we could make all the difference in education."
One of her main goals is to eliminate LIFO (Last Hired, First Fired). This rule was put in place to protect the experienced teachers from being fired just because they're at the top of the salary scale. Suppose we get rid of LIFO (God forbid). Suppose we get rid of seniority and keep the "effective" teachers. What does this even look like? How do we know the kindergarten teacher or the junior high P.E. teacher is effective? Because they're younger? What protections will be in place for the older, more expensive teacher?
Rhee, Guggenheim Davis, Bill Gates, politicians, and other so-called reformers want to run schools like little corporations. That's why the George Bush Institute is busy training former military officials and people who have backgrounds in business, to be principals. That's why New York City mayor Michael Bloomberg keeps hiring people from the business world (First Joel Klein, now Cathie Black) to run his city's public schools. That's why the US Senate just passed a bill that makes it easier for school districts to hire principals who don't have any educational experience.
So again, I ask. Why would anyone want to be a teacher?
Why would anyone want to be a teacher in New Jersey? Governor Chris Christie loves to, ahem, throw his weight around. He loves to pick fights with the teachers in his state. He said that "there are only two professions where consequences don't matter. Teachers and weathermen."
And judging by the size of Chris Christie, I predict today's forecast in New Jersey will be "Cloudy With A Chance of Meatballs!"
Why would anyone want to be a teacher in Providence, Rhode Island? Last week, all 2,000 teachers were warned they may lose their jobs because of budget cuts.
Why would anyone want to be a teacher in Wisconsin? It's consistently one of our best states as far as national test scores go. But that's not enough for newly elected Republican Governor Scott Walker. He wants to take away his teacher's bargaining rights to balance the budget. Nevermind that it was he who messed up the budget in the first place by handing tax cuts to wealthy business interests.
Why would anyone want to be a teacher in New York? Governor Andrew Cuomo wants to end LIFO. And he wants to slash state funding to schools for the blind, deaf, and severely disabled, while cutting taxes for millionaires.
Why would anyone want to be a teacher in Florida? Republican Governor Rick Scott wants to suck tax dollars out of public schools and give them to Catholic schools for voucher-like purposes. And for those who don't know, vouchers are like winning lottery tickets. They're "get-out-of-jail-free-cards" for poor kids.
Did I say jail? Whoops. I meant public schools!
And finally, why would anyone want to be a teacher in Maine? Steve Bowen, the Commissioner of Education, wants to implement, and I'm not making this up, "virtual" charter schools. Imagine all the tax dollars we can save if we don't bother with building real schools? We can just put the curriculum online and let the kids learn from home!
But why stop there? Hey Steve Bowen, I got a great idea. Let's turn our kid's education into an I-phone app that they can download whenever they feel like it. Or we can turn their education into a video game for the X-Box (Grand Theft Algebra. or Call of Duty: Modern Geography). Or let's just put the entire curriculum on Facebook. I'm sure the students will enjoy doing their homework on Facebook. Just as long as it doesn't interfere with them playing Farmville!
It would be nice if we stopped blaming the unions. There are plenty of states that don't even have unions. And you know what? THEY DON'T FIRE THEIR BAD TEACHERS EITHER! So what's their excuse?
And if teacher unions are the problem, why do the states that have unions (Massachusetts, New Jersey, Connecticut, New Hampshire, and Vermont) consistently have the highest scores on national tests and states that don't (South Carolina, North Carolina, Alabama, Georgia, Mississippi, Arizona, and Texas) have the lowest?
Which reminds me, I need to change my Final Four picks on my Race To The Top bracket!
Our public school system is a disaster. I'm not "Waiting For Superman." I'm waiting for FEMA! And I'm waiting for politicians, the media, and the clueless public to stop demonizing teachers. They are underpaid and they are held to impossible standards. What if we required the police to eliminate all armed robberies, murders, and assaults? And if the cops aren't successful, we can fire them all and replace them with private contractors.
Does that make any sense? No. Of course it don't! So why the hell do we expect the same from our teachers?
I'll end this with a beautiful quote from Diane Ravitch, professor at New York University's Steinhardt School of Culture, Education, and Human Development:
"Nations that disrespect teachers don't have successful schools. That which we value, we treat with honor."